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March 17, 2009

Fascinated confusion


I went by some party recently at this high-end Panty Hut.. Kiki de Montparnasse.

They got all kinda treats in there, but I settled on this thing. A riding crop!!
The super ubery hot mama who helped me walked me up to the register and then announced it was 189.00.
Immediately my ego popped up, and I said “sure, In” instead of tellin her that she was out of her fucking mind and take the riding crop and, well, go have fun.

So now it’s home, and sits on my dresser, and I have no idea what to do with it.
You pull this thing out, or jump outta the bed to go wrangle it and you come runnin back to bed, you’ve immediately taken shit to another level. Which would be fine, the problem is I don’t know how to correctly execute any “riding crop moves” with it.

Do I use small “flicking taps” or do I wind up and bring down a thunderous continual “WHAP”?

Do I use it on myself too?

oy….. quality problems I guess.

Please feel free to leave suggestions.

Until then I’ll just smack furniture in my house with it.

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