March 11, 2009

Dear Buffalo: Get your Excedrin Ready

In the “really depressing and you are gonna get everything you deserve” category, The Buffalo Bills swooped up the “Turd in shoulder pads”, Terrell Owens.
Over the course of this guys 13 years in the league, his obsession with himself has gotten him kicked off three teams.

Football, unlike any other sport, is the COMPLETE TEAM GAME.

A freakishly talented man with physical gifts maybe unrivaled in the history of the NFL, this mental case has ruined the work of hundreds of teammates, and destroyed the concepts of comraderie and unity and togetherness.

More than any other sport, football is very akin to the idea of war. And if the entire “team” is uniformly makin it’s way through the jungle, and one asshole starts screaming and running madly and flailin his arms around, and he’s not one with the cause with the same purpose, well, the entire squad gets mowed down.

You can’t win consistently in the NFL, unless EVERYONE is on the same page.

No matter how good anyone is, alone.

Buffalo, enjoy the six million dollar shitburger you just bought. It may look pretty and scrumptious, but is, well, gonna TASTE like shit.

Laughing AT you, not with you,


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